My Story Part Two

We pick it up where emily asked how Brianna getting pregnant with 3 different men, having 4 kinds (preggo with the fifth) could be easy, and Brianna has just said "Its a long story."

Sam: Then you'd better get started telling it then, huh?

Brianna: Shut up, Sam.

Lauren: I don't remember you being so sarcastic.

Jordan: I do. (sad frown) but then Sam had Jordanitis.

Sam I'm getting it right now, actually. I'm beginning to remember why I was so eager to get away from you people!

Lauren: Eager, huh? Was that why you cried like a baby on graduation day?

Sam: Lauren! You know we are never supposed to talk about graduation day around Jolie!

Jolie: Its okay. I'm over it now.

Brianna: Really? I didn't think you would ever get over that. How'd you manage it?

Jordan: 5 years of therapy.

Jolie: Jordan! You promised you wouldn't tell! I should sue you for violating my privacy. You were my doctor, you're not allowed to talk about that!

Emily: What happened on graduation day?

Jordan: I'd forgotten you missed graduation.

Sam: Yeah, Emily, why didn't you go to graduation?

Emily: (sighing) I drove my car through a glass window store front.

Sam: Idiot.

Emily: I had to miss a squirrel. He was such a cute little squirrel-

(Jordan cuts Emily off mid-sentence)

Jordan: I shot him.

Emily: What?!

Jordan: I found him and shot him. It was his fault you wrecked. That and I love killing things.

Sam: (rolls her eyes) I can't believe you were allowed to become a therapist. Who would come see you?

Jordan: (shrugging her shoulders nonchalantly) Jolie did.

Emily: YOU SHOT THE SQUIRREL? You mean I WRECKED MY CAR to avoid hitting it, and you went back and SHOT IT? I wrecked my car FOR NOTHING!?

Jordan: (grinning) You're welcome. Anyways, back to the topic of why Jolie hates to think about graduation.

Sam: She got drunk, and I mean SMASHED!! The night before graduation.

Jolie: Jordan's fault.

Jordan: It's not my fault you can't hold your liquor.

Sam: Anyway, so when she went to get her diploma, she stumbled and fell down, and then she threw up right on the principal's feet. And when Walters flipped, Jolie said, 'Relax man, you're a piece of throw-up anyway. It'll blend right in.' Walters was pissed and called the police so Jolie spent graduation at the police station. After being hauled away in handcuffs shouting, 'You'll never take me alive coppers!' Like a bad line from an even worse movie.

Jolie: Can we just forget about that? I want to hear Brianna's story.

(SIDE NOTE THE PENS JUST SCORED!!!!!!! GO FEDOTENKO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Brianna: Okay, okay. So right after graduation Christopher and I decided to get married. We were so happy. a year later we had the twins, Christina and Bryce. They were about two years old when the insanity started.

Lauren: What happened?

Brianna: Adam. He'd just broken up with his girlfriend, and as we all know he'd always been in love with me. Well, he asked me on a date as friends and I said yes. Well he got me drunk and convinced me he was Christopher.

Sam: Wait a sec. You were married to Christopher, had been married to him for three years, and you couldn't tell the difference between him and Adam?

Jordan: DUH, she was drunk.

Brianna: Yeah Sam, shut up.

Sam: hummph.

Brianna: As I was saying, before I was so rudely interrupted, I thought Adam was Christopher. He took me to a hotel. And nine months later, Britney and Adam jr. were born. Christopher and I managed to work through it.

Jordan: So who was the girlfriend that had broken up with Adam?

Brianna: I don't know. He never said.

(Lauren looks away nervously, trying to make herself invisible)

Jordan: I'm surprised you and Christopher were able to work through it.

Brianna: It was a lot easier once Adam came out of the closet.

Lauren: I knew IT! I knew Adam was gay! He had that vibe- I know my gay people!

Brianna: Then why were you in love with him?

Lauren: I wasn't sure he was gay. Now that I know he is I'm relieved that I broke up with him before he broke up wi- ( she cuts herself off, can't believe what she has just said)

Brianna: I KNEW IT! Do you still love him?

Lauren: ( avoiding the question) I'm so embarrassed. Oh my gosh, did I turn him gay? that would be just my luck- apparently I'm so hard to be with that guys decide its better to be gay then deal with crazy women. I wonder who the hell the guy was that stole his heart!?



TO BE CONTINUED!!!!

Do I have you hooked yet? Have I offended anyone yet? If so...you're welcome!! Gotta love the critics!!!